Bitter or Better

By Katong TMC -
Opening address for 17 April 2014 meeting

A colleague backstabs you and causes you to lose your promotion. 
Do you get bitter or better?

Your loved ones disappoint you. They do not meet your expectations and they keep letting you down. 
Do you get bitter or better?

You rehearse very hard for weeks for a club speech contest, only to lose to the veteran speaker who came up with his speech on the day of the contest. 
Do you get bitter or better?

Good evening, fellow toastmasters, ladies and gentlemen.

I know bitterness intimately. He was my best friend for a few years of my life… wasted years I must add. My loved ones did not meet my expectations and they let me down time and again. Because of that, I let bitterness become a permanent resident in my heart. And you know what? Bitterness has many good friends who came crowding into my heart along with him. His good friends are resentment, anger and misery.

But I got really sick of them. I decided to kick them out. Since I had experienced being bitter and it didn’t do any good for me at all, I decided to get better. 

Better at what you may ask? I got better at seeing things in a positive light. I got better at learning to improve myself to be a better wife and a better mother, and through toastmasters, to be a better communicator.

Once I embarked on this positive journey of becoming better, I learned that even if I can’t change the situation, or the other person, I can still change my thoughts, my attitudes and my perspectives. By doing so, I began to experience more peace and happiness in my life.

In the words of author Lysa Terkeurst, “I can’t control the things that happen to me each day, but I can control how I think about them. I can say to myself, “I have a choice to have destructive thoughts or constructive thoughts right now. I can wallow in what’s wrong and make things worse, or I can ask God for a better perspective to help me see good even when I don’t feel good.”

So the next time you face obstacles in your path, remember you have a choice. 
Don’t get bitter, get better at overcoming obstacles and learning from the experience.


by Joni Siah, DTM
Club President Jan-Jun 2014

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